“Anyone feel cursed like the world is against them?”
I recently came across this raw, honest confession on a forum. Someone pouring out their frustration, feeling like a magnet for bad luck, exhausted from trying, and wondering if they’ve been cursed. Their pain was real. Their anger was justified. And honestly? We’ve all been there.
But what caught my attention wasn’t just their pain—it was what I saw beneath it.
The Blessing Hidden in Your “Curse”
Here’s what I told them, and here’s what I want to tell you if you’re feeling the same way:
You’re blessed.
I know—that sounds insane when your life feels like it’s falling apart. But hear me out.
You’re blessed that you can still feel this deeply. You’re blessed that you can express it, release it, put it into words. You’re blessed that somewhere inside you, there’s still a part that believes things should be better—because if you’d truly given up, you wouldn’t be this angry.
Anger is proof you still care. Frustration is proof you still have hope, even if it’s buried under layers of disappointment.
It’s Not Who You Are—It’s What You’ve Practiced
Here’s the hard truth: You’re not cursed. You’ve just practiced believing you are.
Think about it. If something bad happened when you were young, and then another bad thing, and another—your brain started looking for patterns. It started predicting: “This is how things go for me.”
And then confirmation bias kicked in. Your brain started:
Noticing every bad thing that happened
Ignoring or minimizing the good things
Interpreting neutral events as negative
Creating a story: “I’m unlucky. The world is against me.”
This isn’t who you are. It’s what you’ve practiced believing about yourself.
And just like you practiced this belief over years, you can practice a different one. It won’t be instant. It won’t be easy. But it’s possible.
The World of Shit and Flowers
Let me paint you a picture:
This world is made of both shit and flowers.
Shit is:Cheap
Easy to find
Everywhere you look
Oddly comforting (because it’s familiar)
Doesn’t require effort
Flowers are:
Expensive (they cost you effort, vulnerability, hope)
Hard to reach
Painful to grow (patience, care, disappointment when they die)
But deeply, profoundly rewarding once you learn to tend them
Most people spend their lives in the shit because it’s easier. It’s familiar. It doesn’t require them to hope and risk being disappointed again.
But you know what? You’re already in the shit anyway. So what do you have to lose by reaching for the flowers?
The Paradox of Trying Harder
You said: “The more effort I put in, the harder it falls.”
I get it. You’ve been trying to force doors open that keep slamming shut. You’ve been pushing boulders uphill that keep rolling back down.
But here’s the thing—maybe you’re pushing in the wrong direction.
When we’re desperate, we often try to force things:
Force people to like us
Force opportunities to work out
Force happiness to arrive
But real growth doesn’t come from force. It comes from alignment.
It comes from:
Understanding yourself deeply
Noticing what drains you vs. what energizes you
Learning to stop fighting reality and start working with it
Redirecting effort toward what actually serves you
You’re not putting in too much effort. You’re putting effort in the wrong places.
Being the Optimist Who Can’t Find His Own Silver Lining
This broke my heart: “People say I’m optimistic because when shit happens to them, I give them silver linings. I just say shit that happened to me and that’s your silver lining?”
You give everyone else hope. You help them see light in their darkness. But you can’t see it for yourself.
Why?
Because when we help others, we step outside ourselves. We see their situation objectively. We can spot the lessons, the growth, the hidden blessings.
But when it’s our life? We’re too close. We’re in the pain, not observing it.
Here’s your practice: Talk to yourself the way you talk to your friends.
When something goes wrong, imagine your best friend came to you with this exact problem. What would you tell them? What silver lining would you find?
Then give yourself that same compassion.
The Mirror I’m Holding Up
I told this person: “I don’t want to change your feelings—I just want to act as a mirror to your reflection.”
So let me hold up that mirror for you too.
What I see is:
Someone strong enough to keep trying despite repeated disappointment
Someone kind enough to help others even while drowning themselves
Someone self-aware enough to recognize their patterns
Someone brave enough to admit they’re struggling
Someone who still wants to be happy (which means they haven’t given up)
What you see is:
A cursed person
A failure
Someone the universe is against
Someone who can’t catch a break
Same person. Different perspective.
The question is: Which reflection will you practice believing?
Everyone Feels Messy in This World
You’re not special because you’re struggling. You’re human.
Everyone feels like the world is against them sometimes. Everyone has seasons where nothing goes right. Everyone questions if they’re cursed, broken, or fundamentally flawed.
The difference between people who stay stuck and people who break free isn’t that bad things stop happening to them.
It’s that they stop making “bad things happening” mean something about their worth.
Things happen. Some good, some bad, most neutral. Your job isn’t to control what happens. Your job is to control the story you tell yourself about what happens.
The Practice: From Cursed to Blessed
Here’s how you shift from feeling cursed to recognizing you’re blessed:
- Notice the Good (Even When It Feels Fake)
Every night, write down 3 things that didn’t go wrong today. Not even things that went right—just things that didn’t go wrong.
“I didn’t get sick today”
“I had food to eat”
“Someone smiled at me”
Your brain needs to practice noticing neutral and positive things. Start small.
- Challenge the Curse Story
When something bad happens, ask:
“Is this actually proof I’m cursed, or just a normal bad thing that happens to everyone sometimes?”
“Have good things ever happened to me? (Yes.) So am I actually cursed, or just going through a rough patch?”
- Stop Practicing Victimhood
This will sting, but: Every time you say “I’m cursed,” “Nothing works for me,” “I’m unlucky”—you’re practicing that identity.
What if you practiced a different identity?
“I’m going through a challenging season”
“I’m learning resilience”
“I’m discovering what doesn’t work so I can find what does”
- Redirect Your Effort
Stop trying to force things. Start experimenting.
What brings you peace? Do more of that.
What drains you? Do less of that.
What have you been forcing that keeps failing? Let it go.
- Seek the Flowers
Yes, they’re hard to grow. Yes, it’s painful. But start planting seeds:
One genuine conversation
One moment of beauty in nature
One act of self-compassion
One small risk toward something you actually want
The Truth About Silver Linings
The silver lining of feeling cursed? You’re being invited to wake up.
When life keeps knocking you down, it’s not a curse—it’s a message: “The way you’re doing things isn’t working. Try something different.”
Maybe the universe isn’t against you. Maybe it’s trying to redirect you toward something better, and you keep fighting the detour.
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